The ‘What are we?’ moment: Over 1000 daters share what pushed them to define their relationship

The dreaded question, “So what are we?” often sends shivers down daters’ spines but a recent survey by Indian dating app QuackQuack reveals the pivotal moments that push people to seek clarity. Polling 10,536 daters aged 25-35 across Tier 1, 2 and 3 cities, the survey uncovered that while timing varies, the reasons behind this crucial conversation are rarely random.

The ‘Define The Relationship’ moment in relationships

A significant life change often acts as a catalyst. 27% of daters from Tier 1 and 2 cities admitted that major shifts like moving house or starting a new job prompted them to assess their relationships. Surbhi (29) from Delhi shared her experience of moving abroad for studies, which solidified her decision to define her relationship rather than leave it in limbo.

For 19% of female daters aged 25-30, the talk stems from a healthy emotional check-in. After investing significant time and emotions, they initiate the conversation to ensure the relationship is on the right track and their time isn't being wasted on a connection going nowhere.

Interestingly, a twinge of jealousy can be an eye-opener for men. 3 in 5 men from metros and suburbs admitted that seeing someone else express interest in their match, or even close friends settling down, spurred their DTR moment. 22% of men surveyed confessed that a perceived rival was the biggest motivator. Ankush, an assistant professor from Mumbai, realised his jealousy signified deeper feelings, prompting him to seek definition before losing his connection.

Sometimes, clarity emerges from chaos. 14% of participants had the conversation after emotional turmoil; for 2 in 5, it was a realisation of non-exclusivity, while 3 in 6 understood they had stronger feelings than previously admitted. The survey suggests that for over 35% of online daters, defining the relationship, even if belatedly, helped them either progress or move on.