Monkey Barring: Save yourself from heartbreak by knowing about this dating trend

With new age dating, comes new age ways of dating and several stages of it. While earlier, people used to meet, see if they liked each other and sometimes spent the whole life knowing each other; today people like to text compatibility first and spend the rest of the days in partnership, later. In order to find out who suits one the best, the unique stage of monkey barring has developed. It is a stage where one is in a relationship but keeps a lookout for a ‘better’ person and even goes on multiple dates.  

All you need to know about monkey barring and its toxicity

A person who is following the course of action that falls under monkey barring would be showing multiple signs of not staying true to the current relationship. First, they would also be distracted even though they are with someone. This distraction can be an offshoot of talking to several people over dating apps or personal chats. Second, they might miss important events or days because they are physically present somewhere else with another person, who is not their partner. Third, their ambitious drive towards finding the ‘perfect’ match would always make them find faults with their present partner. This would eventually turn the relationship bitter. Fourth, they would move on from the present relationship sooner than one could have thought. It also means that their emotional vulnerability is not affected as they choose to move quickly from one relationship to another.

Is monkey barring a form of cheating?

Since dating terms and their boundaries are so new in contemporary relationship dictionary that one cannot really pinpoint and dictate the perimeters. However, to an outsider, the constant search for a better person and even going out behind one’s back to meet new people may come across as mild cheating. If you realise that your present relationship is dwindling or you are stuck in the middle of an abusive relationship and are trying hard to move on, then the situation might not be considered cheating. But if you are in a perfectly healthy relationship and you think that you are ‘bored’ of it or someone fancier caught your eyes who you want to date, then it may be considered a form of cheating.

What does monkey barring tell us about the person?   

Anyone who has resorted to monkey barring once, can very well follow it multiple times. It somehow becomes ingrained in their nature. Dating such a person might mean sudden heartbreak and emotional betrayal for the partner. As for the ones into monkey barring, they always tend to have unsteady relationships because of their behaviour. They are also quite indecisive since the definition of a ‘perfect partner’ is almost utopian in nature. Further, being able to move on from one relationship to another without feeling emotionally jolted can be a sign of emotional hollowness. Dating someone who has these traits would mean inviting unnecessary relationship trauma and trust issues. It is thus, ideal, that one stays away from those who are into monkey-barring.

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